Our Family's Journey to Peaceful Parenting and Unschooling.
Saturday, April 13, 2013
We like natural consequences here. Also, we don't make the kids do chores. Both are key points in the coming story.
Last week Josh (8y) broke a window screen. Not maliciously, but it
broke nonetheless. Unrelated to the screen breaking incident, I had been
feeling that Josh wasn't appreciating how much work I put into running
our home and making sure everyone's needs were met. So when we talked ab...out
what to do about the screen, we agreed that he would need to pay for a
new one. In order to earn money to pay for it, he will be doing all the
household chores this week for me.
The important distinction
here is that he isn't being forced to do any chores under threat of
punishment, and the doing of the chores itself is not a punishment.
Rather, we talked about what had happened, how it could be remedied, and
which option for remedy satisfied the both of us. His input held just
as much weight as mine, and Josh was actually the one who suggested this
We've got a rough schedule for chores- Monday wash
sheets, towels, and laundry. Tuesday clean bathrooms and windows, file
paperwork. Wednesday dust and vacuum the bedrooms. Thursday dust, sweep,
and mop the living room and kitchen. Friday mow the lawn and turn the
compost. Dishes and general tidying each day.
sharing how we came to the agreement on Thursday because I wanted to see
how he handled his first day of work today. He reminded me last night
before bed that "tomorrow starts my week of work". I've been told
multiple times to "stop doing that Mom, I'll get it. I'm doing all the
work this week, remember?" All the sheets have been stripped, washed,
and replaced. All the laundry sorted, washed, folded and put away. Not a
single complaint. Not even one. It's really beautiful. This is the way
to do it, no threats, coercion, or punishments. This is working for us.