I was reminded of the "Sex Talk" article I shared last week while we were driving to get milk shakes tonight. Here's the conversation Josh and I had.
Josh (age 9)- So you were 19 when you became a parent, and your mom was 17 when she became a parent. Do you think I will still be in my teens when I become a parent?
Me- I love being your mother and all it has taught me, but I do hope you will be older before you have kids. It was really hard becoming a parent so young. I think it would be easier for you to be sure not to get anyone pregnant.
Me- Do you know what you could do to prevent getting a girl pregnant?
Josh- I don't think so.
Me- Well, when you put your penis inside a girls vagina and ejaculate, that's when the sperm leaves your body and goes to meet the egg. You could have sex other ways, like use your hands instead, which can be just as fun. Or you could wear a condom. That goes over your penis and keeps the sperm from getting to the egg. Really you should use a condom every time you have sex, because you can get diseases from people without one. When you're married and only having sex with one person for the rest of your life, then you don't have to worry about diseases so much.
Josh- Hmmm. So were you married to my biological father?
Me- I was.
Josh- But then you got divorced.
Me- Yes. Another thing I hope you never have to go through. It was heartbreaking and very hard for everyone. We were young and had no idea what love was about, or what marriage was about.
Josh- So why did you get married if you had no idea what marriage was about?
Me- Oh we THOUGHT we knew. We thought we knew a lot of things. I think that's part of being young, thinking you know a lot more than you really do.
Josh- But then you did and you were like, "WHOA!"
Me- Yeah, we were like, "Whoa! We had no idea! This is not working out like we thought it would."
No need for a "big talk" about the "big" things in life. A series of smaller, relaxed conversations is the better way to go, in my opinion.