I
had this grand idea that I would wake up early to clean the living room
today. There were toys out, and I needed to sweep and mop.
Well of course, Bug (2y) decided to get up mere minutes after I'd started. I got him some breakfast, put on a movie and attempted to clean around him. I am scootching couches around, finding more food pieces and toys than should be physically possible of existing i...n the spaces underneath. Par for the course, but frustrating nonetheless. Then Josh (8y) woke up and the boys both run outside. Yes! I can finish up in peace! Oh no, silly me. They're running back in, with grassy socks, through my piles of dirt.
I lost it. I yelled something about "What on earth?!" and "Trying to clean!" and "So inconsiderate!" and "Get outside or go to your room!" Bug starts crying, he's only heard me freak like this once or twice before. Josh knows I need some space, so he picks Bug up and takes him outside to play.
I finish up mopping, and no sooner than I turn off the mop they run in with dirty feet, Bug still crying. I lose it again and yell about going to their rooms. Josh stands up to me, looks me in the eye and says "No". I got ticked off, but he would not back down. Finally I said, "Look, I'm obviously not in a good state of mind right now. Please don't push me. I need a minute to calm your brother down. I know I owe you an apology and I'll be there in a few minutes."
After I clean up Bug, spot clean the floor again, and calm down I go talk to Josh.
Me- Hey. I just realized, I haven't had anything to eat, nor any coffee, and you haven't eaten either. You think we'd both feel better after eating something?
Josh- Ugh, Mom. You know you don't act right before you have coffee.
Me- I know. What do you want?
Josh- Egg sandwiches.
Me- Okay, let's eat and talk. (later while eating) I'm sorry I lost my temper and yelled at you. I want the house clean and I felt like I wasn't get any help with it.
Josh- Well, I was trying to keep Bug happy outside, but he just wanted you. It would have been better if I was mopping and you were taking care of him instead. You're better at keeping him happy, and I'm better at mopping anyway.
Me- That's a great suggestion. Would you be willing to do that next time the house needs mopped?
Josh- Yeah.
Me- Okay, awesome. I also need you to be aware of things like coming inside with dirty socks or shoes, and take them off at the door. Can you help me with that?
Josh- *sigh* Yeah....sorry I made more mess while you were cleaning.
Me- I forgive you. Thank you for being patient with me when I lost my temper, and for the really helpful suggestion for next time. Can you forgive me for yelling at you?
Josh- Yes, I forgive you.
Me- Can I have a hug?
Josh- *leans into me*
Lessons learned- Nothing productive should happen before breakfast. Give up on having a clean floor for a couple more years. Listen to my kids more, they've got some great ideas.
Well of course, Bug (2y) decided to get up mere minutes after I'd started. I got him some breakfast, put on a movie and attempted to clean around him. I am scootching couches around, finding more food pieces and toys than should be physically possible of existing i...n the spaces underneath. Par for the course, but frustrating nonetheless. Then Josh (8y) woke up and the boys both run outside. Yes! I can finish up in peace! Oh no, silly me. They're running back in, with grassy socks, through my piles of dirt.
I lost it. I yelled something about "What on earth?!" and "Trying to clean!" and "So inconsiderate!" and "Get outside or go to your room!" Bug starts crying, he's only heard me freak like this once or twice before. Josh knows I need some space, so he picks Bug up and takes him outside to play.
I finish up mopping, and no sooner than I turn off the mop they run in with dirty feet, Bug still crying. I lose it again and yell about going to their rooms. Josh stands up to me, looks me in the eye and says "No". I got ticked off, but he would not back down. Finally I said, "Look, I'm obviously not in a good state of mind right now. Please don't push me. I need a minute to calm your brother down. I know I owe you an apology and I'll be there in a few minutes."
After I clean up Bug, spot clean the floor again, and calm down I go talk to Josh.
Me- Hey. I just realized, I haven't had anything to eat, nor any coffee, and you haven't eaten either. You think we'd both feel better after eating something?
Josh- Ugh, Mom. You know you don't act right before you have coffee.
Me- I know. What do you want?
Josh- Egg sandwiches.
Me- Okay, let's eat and talk. (later while eating) I'm sorry I lost my temper and yelled at you. I want the house clean and I felt like I wasn't get any help with it.
Josh- Well, I was trying to keep Bug happy outside, but he just wanted you. It would have been better if I was mopping and you were taking care of him instead. You're better at keeping him happy, and I'm better at mopping anyway.
Me- That's a great suggestion. Would you be willing to do that next time the house needs mopped?
Josh- Yeah.
Me- Okay, awesome. I also need you to be aware of things like coming inside with dirty socks or shoes, and take them off at the door. Can you help me with that?
Josh- *sigh* Yeah....sorry I made more mess while you were cleaning.
Me- I forgive you. Thank you for being patient with me when I lost my temper, and for the really helpful suggestion for next time. Can you forgive me for yelling at you?
Josh- Yes, I forgive you.
Me- Can I have a hug?
Josh- *leans into me*
Lessons learned- Nothing productive should happen before breakfast. Give up on having a clean floor for a couple more years. Listen to my kids more, they've got some great ideas.
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